Children, don’t you just love them.  Don’t you love the way they are so honest.  If a small child says they love you or hate you, you can be pretty sure they mean it.  You always know where you stand with a child.  They are just so honest.  Pity we sometimes change as we grow older isn’t it.

Now I’ve been thinking about our self-esteem.  My favourite “hobby horse” you might say.  Well yes I guess it is.

Now suppose whenever we were with a small child, whether it be your own or a grand child or perhaps a friend’s child, we gave that child praise instead of criticism.  What difference do you think it would make to that child.

Have a look back at your own childhood.  Think about the times when you would have liked praise from either a parent or teacher or coach and it wasn’t forthcoming.  How did you feel?

Did you feel unworthy, unwanted, ignored, stupid.I am thinking of an incident I witnessed some weeks ago.  I was in a shopping centre and a little girl was with her dad.  She was holding a
drink and for whatever reason handed it to her dad.  In the interaction it slipped and fell and some of the drink splashed onto her dad. 

He became quite angry with her and told her she was stupid and should have taken more care.

Now I was wondering as I looked at the situation if it wasn’t his low self esteem that made him yell at her.  Did he feel stupid for not taking the cup properly from her.  Had he in his childhood been criticized for dropping his cup.  Had this memory stayed with him up until adulthood.  I think perhaps this may have been the case.

See how it works.  We drop something as a child, we get yelled at, we grow up and when our child drops something we respond as we were responded to.

Viscous circle isn’t it. 

How about we change this pattern. 

When you are tempted to criticize a child, stop, think.  Is it something in your childhood that you are reacting to.

How about we try to uplift our children as much as we can.  Give them praise and make them feel special, so that when they become adults and have their own families they will treat their children differently and eventually the world will be full of caring, loving, compassionate human beings with high self esteem.

WORTH A TRY, DON’T YOU THINK